I write when I feel like it. I don’t write in chronological order, and I rarely make edits to what I previously wrote. It’s very impulsive and some might even say chaotic. It reflects my stream of consciousness. Most of the time, my thoughts are way too fast for me to type them all out, and that frustrates me to no end. I also have a pretty bad memory, so I tend to forget a lot of my immediate thoughts if I don’t write them down right then and there.

Right now, I’m sitting on a bus from Mansa to Lusaka, a 10-11 hour bus ride that I’m sure I will make many many times during my service, and I’m resting. I slept maybe 3 or 4 hours last night, convincing myself, yet again, that it’s better to be tired than rested when you’re about to sit on a bus for that long. I still agree with this mindset because I would drive myself crazy if I was wide awake for this long and unable to move very much. But in practice, I find that I’m never able to sleep well on transportation like this. The bus ride is bumpy, people are loud, there is Christian Rock music blasting on the speakers, the driver honks his horn often, etc etc etc. Maybe I’ll squeeze in a 30 minute to 1 hour nap here and there, but it’s rarely for longer than that. That being said, I’m probably going to keep using this method lol. It was worth it to stay up, drink wine, and play cards against humanity with my friends last night.

In this moment, I woke up from my short nap and felt the urge to write.

I think I’m a very dynamic person, but some may view me as being passive. I’m good at taking a step back and letting others talk, and only interjecting in a conversation when I feel like it adds something. I really try to not talk over people, but sometimes I do because I want my thought to get out there before the conversation transforms into something else, which often happens very quickly in big groups. I tend to generally speak when asked to or when I feel like I can slip in a joke or some insight or whatnot.

That’s what I find so great about starting this blog. I wasn’t sure what exactly it would turn into when I started it. I thought it could just be a recap of my time in the Peace Corps and not have too much creativity involved. It has started to evolve more into an analysis of my feelings rather than a summary of events. I’m able to share my take on things, even if I don’t always share them verbally. This is a good PSA about introverts (I call myself an extroverted introvert but my Myers Brig results say I’m purely extroverted…) or just people who are not as vocal as others: they still have thoughts and opinions too!! Most people are not bland slices of white bread. You just have to get to know them better to see that they’re really a delicious crispy piece of garlic bread on the inside 😉

I’m a very passionate person about things that may seem silly to others. Some I share, others I don’t. There’s no rhyme or reason for it. It just depends on if it has come up in conversation before or not. Here are some that come to mind:

The sound of children giggling will forever give me butterflies in my tummy. Children crying, however…

There are a lot of words that send chills down my spine. “Damp” and “chunks” are some of them.

I’m so curious about using nature as a tool. I want to learn how to tell time by looking at the sun. So many people in the world do this, since they do not have watches or clocks. I’d also love to learn more about constellations and stars so I can point them out as a cool party trick.

I am frustrated that I do not know how to play a musical instrument. I’d like to learn someday, but I think that day will have to wait.

With that, I wish I wouldn’t get so nervous to sing in front of people. I really enjoy to sing, especially in the morning.

On top of that… I think there is so much magic in music. Music (and food) connect people so quickly and it’s such a great exchange of culture. One of the best times in Peace Corps so far was having a spontaneous dance party at 9pm with a ton of children to Zambian music. :’)

There are few things that make my body feel better than drinking ice cold water while laying outside in the sun in a bathing suit, then taking a cold shower right after I start sweating, and then taking a nap with no alarm clock to wake me up. That’s my definition of a perfect summer afternoon.

I loooove making lists but I’m bad at updating them. I can’t tell you how many incomplete notes I have in my phone and notebooks about “projects I want to explore during my service.” There will be maybe 4-5 examples on one page in my notebook, then a few more additions in my phone, then even more additions in my notebook, but not on the original page—I’ll start over on a fresh page. I think my organizational skills could use some enhancing, but I also think I thrive in chaos and really prefer just writing things down in the moment rather than obsessing over format and organization. However, it is frustrating when I can’t find the second half of my list and have to flip through my notebook many times to find it. Let’s see if I change my habits!

I love that “write” and “right” are homonyms (is that the right word?).

1. It is soooo right to write. Writing helps keep a record of thoughts and stories and histories. (However, some cultures heavily rely on word of mouth, which is honestly so impressive)

2. It is incredible that I have the right to write my feelings and opinions. Not only freedom of speech, but also the ability to write. So many people in the world do not know how to read or write, but I was fortunate enough to live in a place and time where I was able to go to school and learn these skills. I’m also fortunate enough to have the mental ability to perform this skill. (Take some time to check your privilege for tasks that you think are simple and mundane like reading and writing!)

3. I was about to say “it is important to write the right things,” but I don’t like the way that sounds. For the sake of using the homonym, it is fine. What I meant to say is “it is important to write factual things” (aka no fake news or spreading lies). What I don’t mean to say is “you should only write the correct thing/answer/solution/thought.” You should make mistakes and take time to find an answer that fits your situation. Writing can help with that. It can help organize what’s going on in that jumbled brain of yours and visually sort through it on paper/screen, rather than trying to sort through it mentally.

Even if you think you’re not good at writing, try jotting down a few of your thoughts every once in a while. It’s cool to look back and see how past you viewed things. It doesn’t have to be formatted well. You could spell everything wrong and have incorrect grammar. It doesn’t have to make sense to anyone but you. You don’t have to publish your thoughts if you don’t want to. Your thoughts are yours and they are valid and they are important.

I’m really happy with where this blog is going, and I’m excited to see how it keeps evolving.

“And that’s all she wrote,”

—Arielle